New app

Tired of looking at the state of the world and feeling horrified? Are you thinking that things might be even worse than you suspect? That maybe there’s even more to the story?

That’s where our handy app comes in handy. Why wait? Experience Mortify™ for yourself and get the complete bad news all at once!

before Mortify™:

Man suspected in bank heist still at large.

after Mortify™: Serial killer involved in bank heist, which left five injured and seven decapitated, is roaming the city and is almost certainly in your closet right now.

See! It really works!

Thanks Mortify™!

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