I recently boarded a flight. There were two screaming, crying children on the plane. I bought a bag of peanuts and the flight attendant asked if I wanted to donate money to Save the Children.

I asked how much I would have to pay to have the children put down. Then I asked if the crying children happened to have a peanut allergy.

Eventually I understood that I would have to take care of the problem children myself. The service on flights these days is just not what it should be.