Cherub leaves Catholic church to start tech company, plans to make billions.

After changing the name of his tech startup from PraiseBook to Zeta, this cherub is now on his way to becoming the next Silicon Valley sensation to deliver a platform that no one understands but can probably make a lot of money on.

Ex-catholic cherub Dark Fuckerturd: If we can build it, then tear it down, then build it again, then change the name, they’ll come.

Merry ChristMusk

Elon Musk is secretly selling Twitter to Vladimir Putin for an undisclosed amount. Musk says he is “over it” but plans to buy Christmas for 167 billion.

He plans to overhaul the once popular holiday starting by renaming it “ChristMusk”.

“People are tired of the Old Testament and Muhammad and Allah type saviors. They want a tech billionaire savior. I enjoyed the Thorenoussardus article Saviornaire. It was accurate and reflected my view of myself”.

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Forget password managers or keychains. We asked random people on the street about password hygiene and they had this to say:

Billie: Like, don’t use like password123 or something. Use, like password321, you know, mix it up.

Donna: I just use my birthday and my pet’s name. I’m a Virgo and my pet cat Fluffy was always there for me on my birthday. All my friends know my password. You need a good backup system, you know?

Ahmed: You gotta use the same one for everything. Otherwise, how you gonna memba it? Mine is short. It’s gimmeDat420. See how I throw in the big D in the middle. Class dismissed. I smoke a lot of weed yo.

Dave: My friends call me Durb. I don’t trust those password managers. I write that shit on a post it and stick it to the monitor. I got two big ass monitors. I got my shit tight bro. Tight!