Cntrl©

People watch news, politics and weather to keep up with current events, but people also operate under the false assumption that they are somehow controlling outcomes.

News, weather and politics are not particle matter which behave differently, depending on whether or not there’s a viewer. It’s not a Higgs boson… until now!

Employing the latest mathematical solutions from AI, string theory and quantum computing, Cntrl© puts the power to change the way YOU view the universe into YOUR pocket!

Introducing Cntrl© – the app that puts you in control. If you are confronted by news, weather or sports results you don’t like, Cntrl© will activate a patented, tailor made script that will change the results to meet your needs. Just listen to these accolades from happy subscribers:

Jeb Clemons: I live in a trailer in central Florida. When the hurricane hit, I knew I needed some Cntrl©. Instead of evacuating, I just turned on the Cntrl© app and everything was good. Everything was calm, blue skies, errything. When I shut down the app, I was sitting in my comfy chair in the middle of the ocean. I just flip the Cntrl© back on and continued watching my ball game.

Jedediah Fullchurch: I’m a Christian. I ended up at this place where Lawrence Krauss, Neil Degrasse Tyson and Richard Dawkins were talking their atheism and evolution voodoo stuff. I turn on the Cntrl© app and it turned into about the best church service I ever been to. I don’t want to hear things I don’t know about and don’t agree with already.

Johan Jebastian Mock: I left Germany to go and visit Los Angeles. I end up in skid row somehow with the amphetamine and fentanyl people everywhere. I quickly turned on the Cntrl© app and suddenly I was at the Playboy mansion with the beautiful Playboy bunny on her knees before me sucking my Pieter Nikolas. I switch off the app when I finish. I look down and I see a old man asking for five dollars to buy some crack. I keeps the Cntrl© app running all da time now.