No shit

The very popular drug “BS” can lead to serious problems, and even death. Dr Unc explains:

“Yes yes, it’s very true. Inhaling shit from bulls might be very tempting, but I don’t recommend anyone doing it, at least not very often. The very powerful shit can infect your brain causing a very bad brain hemorrhoid. The terrible itchiness inside your head will make you so crazy, and if the hemorrhoids burst you will certainly die very badly.”

Have a safe and happy New Year’s, and stay away from Bullshit!

First car on Mars

Joe: Nice car!
Larry: Yeah, it’s all right, it’s all we could get, really wanted a Toyota, but instead we got this Tesla.
Joe: What’s wrong with it?
Larry: Well, it’s not a Toyota.
Joe: Guess not.
Larry: Yeah, this was a gift from Muskie.
Joe: Elon?
Larry: Yeah, we call him Muskie.
Joe: I don’t know, it’s quite comfortable. I like it!
Larry: Yeah, it drives well.
Joe: Look, look over there! Is that what I think it is?
Larry: Oh, yeah, yeah. Good old Prevalence.
Joe: The Mars rover from the early 2000s?
Larry: Yeah, it’s still going. We don’t know what it’s doing at this point, just sort of drifts around. But you know, we do use it as surveillance to keep an eye on them Dinos.
Joe: Its fast!
Larry: Yeah, I know. It keeps picking up speed. We don’t know why. Every week a little more speed. Last month it was doing about 60. Now it’s doing about 205.
Joe: Solar power?
Larry: Yeah, its solar powered, eh, but every once in a while, when it runs out, we’ll go and fill it with Dino shit and get it going again. It runs on all kinds of fuel, to be honest. One time I found the prevalence just sitting still. With just a little piss in the tank, she took right off again.
Joe: Really?
Larry: Yeah, that thing will run on anything.
Joe: So… are we going?
Larry: Yeah, let’s go. Buckle up. You better be ready cause this thing’s got some get up and go.
Joe: Uhhh…wow!
Larry: I told ya, he he. Yep, since we got this thing boy, it’s been a lot more fun around here, I’ll tell ya.
Joe: The road is bumpy!
Larry: Well, it’s not a road, we pretty much just travel the way of the dinosaurs. If they cut a path, we just use it for a road.
Joe: How can there be dinosaurs here on Mars?
Larry: Well, that’s a long story. Let’s talk more about that when we get to Dino Canyon, we are there in a minute or two.

To be continued…

No shit!

Ok, let’s face it! Picking up your dog’s shit sucks, right? It’s like having a child that never stops shitting where it’s supposed to shit. Never ending shit story, and you just continue to pick it up in your plastic bags of various kinds, day after day, year after year until your dog dies.

Does it really have to be like this!?

We are now looking for investors to develop our latest invention – the dog shit vaporizer!

Our new groundbreaking technology is based on the ancient flamethrowers used during World War 1. A tiny handheld device that turns your dog’s shit into ashes in the blink of an eye! Just burn it and keep on walking!

For any questions please contact us at info@thorenoussardus.com