T-Rex body dysmorphia

Thorenoussardus wandered the Great Plains, bouncing from place to place aimlessly, with exuberance as her only guide. It was warm and sunny this day and she felt free of ambition or purpose. She had barely noticed the storm clouds in the distance and had no regard for any possible threat on the far horizon. The heavy footsteps grabbed her attention and she swung around to look behind her.

Towering at an uncomfortable distance was a colossal Tyrannosaurus Rex, the largest she had ever encountered, bearing its teeth and showcasing its massive jaws. Thorenoussardus fell to the ground, rolling in the short dry grass, laughing hysterically.

The T-Rex closed its great jowls and stared quizzically down at the comparatively smaller dinosaur. What’s so funny, quipped Rex? Thorenoussardus continued to roll around at his large clawed feet laughing even harder than before. Rex, continued to stare down at her, clueless and questioning. Catching her breath after much panting and giggling, she sat up and gave him a questioning look of pity. Your arms, said Thorenoussardus, your arms are so tiny. Rex looked down as much as his large head would allow, tilting his head side to side in an attempt to eyeball his short arms. They’re not THAT small, he quipped. Surely you’ve seen your reflection in the pond, right?! I don’t recall, he said, looking puzzled. Come, I’ll show you, she said.

When they reached the pond, Thorenoussardus said, look down at your reflection. Your arms are quite tiny compared to the rest of you. They’re probably that small to compensate for your large head. Rex just stared into the water, looking dejectedly at his reflection. He stood silently as reality set in like the dying sun.

Thorenoussardus felt his sadness. She reflected back to her episode of laughter with a new sense of shame. “Easy big guy”, she offered. “Millions of years from now when our kind are all gone, humans will be here instead and they will idolize you, especially young boys”. “Really??” he said perkily. “Yes”, she said. “You’re just trying to make me feel better”, he prodded. “No, it’s true! You could have eaten me but you didn’t”. Rex peered down at the little Thorenoussardus as his old self slowly reappeared. “I’m still hungry”, he said.

Thorenoussardus, without missing a beat nervously interjected, “wanna grab a bite together”? As they trotted away from the pond and back to the grassy plain, Rex asked, “So they’re going to love me?” Thorenoussardus responded confidently, “King of the dinosaurs!” And as she looked away muttered under her breath “except for Thorenoussardus.” “What”, said Rex? “Nothing, she responded quickly. I think we’ll find something to eat over there”.

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